Sorry for my absence and otherwise lack of any deviations here. Things on my end aren't so bright at the moment. As a result, the energy to do anything artistic has been sapped away.

My Grandfather is in the hospital, and things aren't looking very good.
He had a bad infection, and had some complications with it. He may have to go to rehab, but I don't know what will happen that far ahead. My Grandmother can't take care of him as much as she did before, and a couple days ago she was admitted into the hospital as well. She's okay, just very weak. I think it's because of all the stress on her. My Mom and I help her alot, but she is the main caregiver in the situation.

I went to see him yesterday, and he was acting strange. He was saying things like someone who knows they're not going to make it. He hasn't been himself either, and he gets very mixed up at times. He gets frightened and lonely like a little kid. The doctors have said he has a touch of Alzheimer's, but I think his condition may be aggravating it.

I'm just trying to think of the better times with him that I remember when I was a kid. Remembering him as he would want to be remembered. I know it's not over yet, but I'm just trying to get myself ready for it. I just want him to be at peace. He's gone through so much in the last couple of years with dialysis, the stroke, and other issues. He can't walk on his own anymore, and he's alot weaker. He used to be so much more independent, but now he's dependent on so many people.

My Aunt Mary, his sister, came up from Key West to stay here and help for about two weeks. She is the only sibling he has left. Three of his brothers have all passed in the last few years, so he was very grateful to see her again. I wish she could've visited on a better occasion, but it can't be helped.

I don't think any of us knows what will happen day to day, so we're just doing as best we can.

I'm trying to find some things to keep me occupied while at home, but they are few. I still have to go job hunting, but everything's been such a wreck that I haven't had the chance. I'll be okay I guess, I just wish life didn't throw such harsh events at me like this. I just went through losing someone dear to me, and this feels like one right after another. With people who've been with you since you were born, it seems as though they'll be around forever. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about my Dad. I don't doubt it'll be similar with my Grandfather.

I just wanted to let you all know why I haven't been around much. I hope everyone else is doing alright. I'll be okay, I just have to get through one day at a time.

~Angela

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